Paperboy is stupid
Some people's kids. We don't have the same level of customer service over here that you enjoy in the States. A lot of the basic crap is handled in house. Take newspapers, for example.
Most of us here don't read kanji, so we subscribe to Stars & Stripes. A little heavy on the military news, but we get the top stories, sports, human interest and the like. We get by. Sort of.
You don't really think about your paper, do you? You call and start a subscription, it arrives at your door every morning and every so often you mail in a payment. Requires a little action on your part, but all in all it's not a real high maintenance relationship.
You know where this is going now, don't you? Yep, it's whine time with Travelin' Ed.
For starters, the paper doesn't come in the morning, it comes in the afternoon. But it's the next day's paper. In other words, this afternoon, Tuesday, I'll get Wednedsay's paper. I mean, should get Wednedsay's paper. Anymore it's a crap shoot if I'll get one or not.
This is actually a complaint that has carried over from the last carrier on to the current carrier. If it's raining out, or sunny and nice, or a day off from school there won't be a delivery at all. The last carrier used to sometimes bring you 2 the next day, but not always. The current one just figures you'll live without it. So I call the complaint line and they send an adult over with a paper. Then in the next day or so we do it all again.
I keep asking them if it wouldn't be more efficient for all concerned if they quit driving all the way over from Yokosuka to re-deliver one paper at a time and instead concentrated on finding more reliable carriers. Apparently, given the slack jawed look I get, that isn't really an option they're considering.
With the arrival of Spring, our carrier, who I have nicknamed the Intermittent Boy, decides quite often that it is too nice a day for me to be expecting a paper and plans his afternoon accordingly.
Now, for the best part. Intermittent Boy comes knocking on my door once a month for his payment. I usually admonish him about how if I am paying for a paper I kinda expect to actually get a paper. Then he responds with the familiar "yeah, whatever" look while politely and quite robot-like answering, "Yes, sir".
So this time I wrote him a check for $13.50. "Sir, it's $16.25 for the month", he explains. "No, son. It's $16.25 for a paper every day. But it's $13.50 for the papers you actulally got around to delivering." "No. I need to get $16.25. That's how much I am supposed to collect." "Well then I guess you need to chip in $2.75, huh. 'Cause I'm not going to pay for papers you don't bring me." And he walked away all dejected.
Now there's 3 final points I wish to make here:
1) Sadly, I kind of expect some ticked off father (or large mother, corn fed and polyester clad) to show up at my door demanding restitution.
2) I don't think the kid sees any kind of cause and effect. He has a job and I should pay him. I didn't get the sense he equated the not doing his job cause with the not getting paid effect.
3) The problem is so routine that most folks neither dock Intermittent Boy nor call to complain and get a replacement delivered. I think that goes a long way towards explaining why the paper company isn't particularly concerned with whether or not we are satisfied.
It'll sure be nice to get back into the "For Profit" world. Stuff works there.
Now to lighten up a little:
'Bama Flame
Don't the nights sure get longer
the more tales we tell.
And the pipe's 'bout as dead as my brain.
Shaver, he's wailin'
and Waylon's been done
and blue eyes done cried in the rain.
This old motel's a cheap one
but hell, it'll do.
Now the road trip has surely begun.
Two good songs we've been making
'tween the breaks we've been taking
and a full keg of beer in the tub.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
The gas station lady
just smiled my direction
so I slipped her a five from my change.
I rolled in a stranger,
her eyes they betray her....
the lady remembers my name.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
North of Interstate 10
where the tonks all begin
and a worn pair of boots are at home.
Two good songs we've been making
'tween the breaks we've been taking
to go out and pee on the lawn.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
Ed
Jamacia
Most of us here don't read kanji, so we subscribe to Stars & Stripes. A little heavy on the military news, but we get the top stories, sports, human interest and the like. We get by. Sort of.
You don't really think about your paper, do you? You call and start a subscription, it arrives at your door every morning and every so often you mail in a payment. Requires a little action on your part, but all in all it's not a real high maintenance relationship.
You know where this is going now, don't you? Yep, it's whine time with Travelin' Ed.
For starters, the paper doesn't come in the morning, it comes in the afternoon. But it's the next day's paper. In other words, this afternoon, Tuesday, I'll get Wednedsay's paper. I mean, should get Wednedsay's paper. Anymore it's a crap shoot if I'll get one or not.
This is actually a complaint that has carried over from the last carrier on to the current carrier. If it's raining out, or sunny and nice, or a day off from school there won't be a delivery at all. The last carrier used to sometimes bring you 2 the next day, but not always. The current one just figures you'll live without it. So I call the complaint line and they send an adult over with a paper. Then in the next day or so we do it all again.
I keep asking them if it wouldn't be more efficient for all concerned if they quit driving all the way over from Yokosuka to re-deliver one paper at a time and instead concentrated on finding more reliable carriers. Apparently, given the slack jawed look I get, that isn't really an option they're considering.
With the arrival of Spring, our carrier, who I have nicknamed the Intermittent Boy, decides quite often that it is too nice a day for me to be expecting a paper and plans his afternoon accordingly.
Now, for the best part. Intermittent Boy comes knocking on my door once a month for his payment. I usually admonish him about how if I am paying for a paper I kinda expect to actually get a paper. Then he responds with the familiar "yeah, whatever" look while politely and quite robot-like answering, "Yes, sir".
So this time I wrote him a check for $13.50. "Sir, it's $16.25 for the month", he explains. "No, son. It's $16.25 for a paper every day. But it's $13.50 for the papers you actulally got around to delivering." "No. I need to get $16.25. That's how much I am supposed to collect." "Well then I guess you need to chip in $2.75, huh. 'Cause I'm not going to pay for papers you don't bring me." And he walked away all dejected.
Now there's 3 final points I wish to make here:
1) Sadly, I kind of expect some ticked off father (or large mother, corn fed and polyester clad) to show up at my door demanding restitution.
2) I don't think the kid sees any kind of cause and effect. He has a job and I should pay him. I didn't get the sense he equated the not doing his job cause with the not getting paid effect.
3) The problem is so routine that most folks neither dock Intermittent Boy nor call to complain and get a replacement delivered. I think that goes a long way towards explaining why the paper company isn't particularly concerned with whether or not we are satisfied.
It'll sure be nice to get back into the "For Profit" world. Stuff works there.
Now to lighten up a little:
'Bama Flame
Don't the nights sure get longer
the more tales we tell.
And the pipe's 'bout as dead as my brain.
Shaver, he's wailin'
and Waylon's been done
and blue eyes done cried in the rain.
This old motel's a cheap one
but hell, it'll do.
Now the road trip has surely begun.
Two good songs we've been making
'tween the breaks we've been taking
and a full keg of beer in the tub.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
The gas station lady
just smiled my direction
so I slipped her a five from my change.
I rolled in a stranger,
her eyes they betray her....
the lady remembers my name.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
North of Interstate 10
where the tonks all begin
and a worn pair of boots are at home.
Two good songs we've been making
'tween the breaks we've been taking
to go out and pee on the lawn.
Don't you slow me down baby,
don't slow me down none.
'Cause the neon is my break of day.
Might be burning out
in this small 'Bama town.
But I'm gonna go out in a flame.
Ed
Jamacia
That's what I'm about. Ramblin' Ed at 4:08 PM
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