No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up

I am technically on vacation although I worked pretty hard on Monday. Then Tuesday I spent the day at the hospital with the wife, and nothing serious or of note about it, working even harder on my Blackberry. Don't get me wrong. It's a useful enough device, but life was a lot simpler when someone had to catch you on the phone in your home. Or wait until they could.

Today, Wednesday, I intend to vacate much more thoroughly. That's the point of a day off, right? I will mow, and nap, and putter with gardening. Perhaps enjoy a frosty Yuengling. I vacate with the best of them. Tonight, I was going to sit around a fire, assuming I could find some un-rain-soaked timber here in the land of afternoon deluges. Then I remembered: Wednesday night...ABC...I SURVIVED A JAPANESE GAMESHOW. Game over for the fire, I've got plans.

Looks like the trip through Montreal may have slid right to the 6th of July timeframe. It's a shame, but you can't slap customers around about messing up your plans. So I smiled over the phone and told 'em, "Whatever you decide is fine. We'll make it work."

Put on my "Dear Abby" hat again this week. I do that for friends and I got one that needs all the encouragement that they can get. That's my middle name, you know, The Encourager. Well, that and Monkey Boy. See....

Once I was all up in arms about the laws that covered the shooting of monkeys in our great nation. And yes, there are laws about that. And needless to say, they tended to favor the shooters rather more favorably than the monkeys. Yeah, go figure. There's no Second Amendment like clause in the Constitution covering your right to not be shot in the head just for being a monkey, which I found profoundly unfair. All a person had to believe was that the monkey might cause damage and they were ripe for shooting. Hell, the same could be said for most children, too. They might cause damage, better pop a cap in 'em now just to be safe. Note: I just now decided that arming the monkeys also might be a right fair compromise. Might not be fair, though, as monkeys have a steady hand and a steely eye. What? I just know these things.

Anyway, long story, I got myself a nickname. And a dang fine one at that.

The saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you, out

Ramblin' Ed

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Catch Me Memphis

Catch me, Memphis
I'm leaving as the evening weeps
I used to play the game for fun
but now I've got to play for keeps
Ain't no worries
Charlotte's just around the bend
The stakes are high, like you and I
and I wonder if it's gonna end

Watch her, Memphis
she's leaving through an unused door
She said, keep me warm and I'll keep you around
Yeah, I've heard that tune before
We shared some secrets
Couple times she shared my bed
Said that we'd be better for it
I would feel a whole lot better
if I were moving on instead

Catch me, Memphis
I'm leaving while the sun's asleep
We used to play this game for fun
but nowadays we play for keeps
I'm on the corner
and I'm waiting for the light to change
Woman took her time
woman wasted mine
She never even asked me for my name

Catch me, Memphis
Out here falling on my face again
been walking miles
down empty aisles
to find you my only friend
Move on over
my days out on the road are through
If Charlotte calls, put on a stall
you know I'd do the same for you.

Ed