Well.Whelp.Welt.

The storyboard:
1. Sat in recliner sipping FHJ (fresh, hot java) and watching David Letterman on my HDD recorder.
2. Unbeknownst to me, I fell asleep.
3. Awakened to "firey crotch" syndrome*
4. Screamed, did a most ungraceful dance That cosisted mostly of hopping around and cursing.
5. Hoped I had learned my lesson, yet somehow knew I had not.

Cannikin, out
Travelin' Ed

* Firey crotch syndrome occurs when you are loosely holding a cup of FHJ while sitting or reclining, fall asleep and uncerimoniously pour that FHJ into your unsuspecting lap. The effect is made all the worse by the fact that it takes just a second or two for your mind to snap off what has happend and that quite actually IT BURNS...OH, IT BURNS SO BAD!!, thereby allowing maximum burn damage to occur. Got it? OK, learn it, live it.