... This will insure future obedience.

This is mostly a waste of time, but sometimes I just like to indulge myself. Anyway, today was a day off and I had time to kill.

Unemployment is like one huge vacation you take with your good friend, poverty.

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I have lots of hair on my chest. Unfortunately, none of it's mine.

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You and I seem relatively compatible... not that relatives should date.

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In dating, it's best to keep yourself high and your standards low.

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Any question can seem rhetorical, if you're dumb enough.

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If God wanted gays to marry, he wouldn't have made so many close-minded voters.

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Question authority - but politely, and while kneeling.

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Wait until your dog does something really bad before having him neutered - this will insure future obedience.

One's name was Jane and the other was plain, but they both had racing motors, out
Ramblin' Ed