Just plain rude

I am all for free speech and have more than once defended someone's right to think any ol' way that they see fit to think, invoking only the "your right to swing stops at the end of my nose" theory. I think I have been fairly consistent in my applications of said theory.

But some things are just plain rude and, more likely than not, offend the majority of those who come in contact with it. They are things best left mutterd indoors, away from innocent bystanders, in the dark, dank recesses of wherever it is that people like this go to find comfort and solitude from the daily grind.

What these things should not be is on bumper stickers, where any passerby might innocently glance upon them and have their morning walk ruined, or perhaps even their whole future morning walk routine ruined for them. Like I said, some things are just plain rude and are the type of thing that, if you go for such things, you should have to seek out. Not something you should stumble upon accidentially.

The offending bumper sticker: GO ARMY - BEAT NAVY. Seriously, what was the dude thinking???

Today is Tuesday. TGIT. T-git. T-git-er-dun. Actually, I'm not real fond of that git er done thing. Anyway, your Tuesday is my Friday. Got paid my help desk wages yesterday, paltry as they were. So, as they say, I have a pocket full of cash and a pretty girl and it's Friday night. That means one thing. Yep, we'll stay in and watch Fear Factor.

But Wednesday I'm taking her into Tampa for some poking around and then, and this is the real reason I want to venture into the big(ger) city, I'm taking her to a place called Thai Sweet Basil for some supposedly very authentic pad prik khing and duck curry. And, if she is not too much a p.i.t.a. all day, and in my experience, pretty girls got that p.i.t.a. thing down pat, probably because pretty is pretty portable and she can take it on down the road to someone else who will put up with her if you should get too voiceferous about her annoyingness, I'll stop by Krispy Kreme on the way home. mmmm... Krispy Kreme. Fastest way on earth to get fat, but man oh man, they sure taste good doing it.

For sheer songwriting prowess, really listen closely to Bob Dylan's TANGLED UP IN BLUE. I am still awed every time I hear it. Really.

Don't forget, Monday nights at 10 PM on A&E. Roller Girls. Chronicles the lives of the Texas Roller Derby on down there in Austin. Mighty good stuff. There, shameless plug is now out of the way.

Ramblin' Ed hint for the day: Try to work the word kaliedescope into conversation today. It'll make you sound spontaneous. Unless it's an all male conversation centering around sports, girls, or... well, I guess there really isn't anything else. If it's one of them man-talks don't try it. You'll just sound fruity.

For them that missed this before it disappeared:

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water and make it drink.

When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up - he's pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. (My Favorite)

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a Delta Force marathon on Satellite TV.


Ian Spector's Random Chuck Norris Fact Generator: www.4Q.cc/ chuck/

Be free. Prosper.

Me, I'm still on the road
Headed for another joint
We always did feel the same
We just saw it from a different point of view
Tangled up in blue, out
Ramblin' Ed