Lipact Tursigs

OK, here's the deal. You wanna make a million or two? Then you find a need and fill it. I think pretty soon you'll all be doing the "I remember him when..." thing, because I just thought up my money maker.

I was driving home, as opposed to those around me who seemed, at best, to be merely aiming their vehicles. I had people on my back bumper, phone in hand. I had SUVs just start to occupy the space and lane I was already in (and then jerk back from whence they had come) with cell phone in hand. I had the woman in front of me, more or less using the lane divider bumps as a sort of real life pinball rail, bouncing from one set to another and then back, and occasionally even abruptly changing lanes to see if maybe she could carom her way home in a lane that moved a little faster. She had her cell in her hand, of course, but also held a smoke in the hand on the wheel. I just shudder to think.

That's when it hit me. Of course! I can make a killing off of those about to do a killing. "How?", you asketh. By manufacturing and marketing Lipact Tursigs, that's how. "Lipact Tursigs??", you query again, like a newbie on a short bus. Yes. Lip Activated Turn Signals. To help allieviate some of the unpleasantness of actually driving properly and signaling your intentions to other drivers. Right now you would have to actually take your phone away from your ear for a full second and a half to signal. That is, of course, outrageous. But with Lipact Tursig, just a twitch of the lips, much akin to the sneer you already routinely use, you can signal left or right and merge into traffic with confidence.

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I now have the 3rd season of Wonder Woman. They're pretty good for 1979 T&A TV. Call me if you want to come over and watch.

Lastly, if you want to see one BUTT UGLY CAT, click the link. Nothing rude or unkind. Just a very, very ugly feline. You've been told.

Today is my Friday and it is Valentine's Day. I got chocolate from the wife. In Japan, women give men chocolate on Valentine's Day. It's nice, and I suppose kind of like when you're short of funds so you stop by a gay bar to let somebody else buy you a few drinks, except without the risk of ending up in the backseat of a pink Caddillac. (Ed note: As I typed that I realized that I shold ought to point out that I have never actually done that, but in theory it SHOULD work.)

Hidey Ho, neighbor, out
Ramblin' Ed