The Prosperity Ceremony, Live from Sukhumvit

Here I sit at the desk in my room. Directly across from me is a huge picture window that allows me a spectacular view of the Chao Praya River and Bangkok beyond, her lights still twinkling far off into the darkness. It is near dawn and soon the serenity turns to bustle, the calm into sights and sounds and smells.

So far we have been most un-touristy. 2 of our 3 days have involved being at dentist appointments. We are having extensive work done for what is turning out to be 25% of what we were being charged back home. And they take Mastercard, which is good, but not MY Mastercard, which is not as good. But it is in and out; get the work done, no forms and no surliness. Good enough.

Yesterday we went about an hour and a half outside of Bangkok. If I had to guess, I’d say North/Northwest. But if I had to guess, I’d also say that I’m still damn sexy, so my judgment is somewhat suspect. We went way out into the rural farmland to a woman’s house. Just for the record, it had a real Marie Leveaux (the Louisiana voodoo queen) feel to the whole thing.

We pulled up and headed on into her house. She was all smiles and warm greetings, very pleasant. In her house was a television along the front wall, a whole bunch of empty floor, and a large-ish Buddha area in the back corner. I never know what to call the Buddha area in a home. Is it a shrine, mini-Wat, or something else? I am not really sure.

Now, let me say this. When it comes to deities, the major ones anyway, I treat them all with equal respect and skepticism. Respect for the deity, as in my mind there is one supreme God, and all people who worship, worship him. Skepticism is for the myth and lore attributed to each by their earthly followers, and especially for the selective literal interpretations of what he wants us to do and who he wants us to kill. I think once we get humans involved in teaching others “what God wants us to do”, it all goes downhill. Now, with that said, I lend no credence to the lesser gods/religions. You are free to worship trees, stones, wise toads, and Korean millionaires, but I don’t assume them to have any real deity status. When I get to heaven I do hope that there is not a wise toad standing there to point out the error of my assumptions. That would suck.

OK, I said that to say this. We had a prosperity ritual while we were there. Again, not a big fan of religious ritual, but also believe no harm comes from it. Besides, it was very important to the wife. So we went in and as I more or less just looked on, fruit and food and drink and whisky and money were all offered up. Candles were lit, and incense lit from them. Eyes were closed all around and chanting begun. With the chickens clucking up a fuss in the back yard and the chanting and candles in the front room, well if you didn’t know better it could all seem a bit of voodoo.

Then, the woman had me light a fistful of candles and she pointed them down over an urn of water. She continued a stream of consciousness chant with her eyes tightly closed, slightly rocking back and forth, while letting the wax from the candles drip into the water. Finally, she put the candles out in the water, took and peered into my hands, made a statement of fact, blew into my hands 3 times and pushed them closed. My wife translated to me that I was going to be very successful at work this year. And, oh by the way, I also needed to buy one frog, one bird, and one turtle and set them free to seal the deal. I said OK. Why? Because it was important to the wife, weren’t you paying attention?

The ritual was repeated for the wife, and for Massom, the woman who came with us out into the country. Then the 4 of us ate and talked for 2 hours or so before we headed back to Bangkok. Nong came back to the Hilton, while I detoured off for a pizza and massage before coming back.

I am not as connected to the internet as I had thought I’d be, but only because I think Hilton wants way too much for the service. Most of the people in places like this are world travelers, but not the get dusty, wander down a side street, buy meat on a stick from a cart vendor types. They want their hotels big and well lit and a taxi to the mall and don’t mind a premium price for it all. Which is cool; it takes all kinds. But I happen to know that Thailand is an extremely wired city, very technology savvy. So I can’t bring myself to pay $25 a day for internet when I can get it for 70¢ an hour on the street, or free in coffee shops and department stores. Yep, Ramblin’ Ed has a cheap streak.

More later. Maybe.

Pome chu Ramblin’ Ed, out
Ramblin’ Ed