Mama X

From , as she puts it herself, the grand old dame. I mean really. Grand? As usual, this is not the entire e-mail and equally as usual any formatting or parenthetical commentary has been added by me.

Son, just finished reading your blog with the interesting opening liners for novel novices. And as for being a torch singer, think twice. Or three orfour times. (Whaaaat? How rude.I am like a songbird.) Besides, you've made women cry already without torching a note. At least that's what I've heard. I know you've made me shed a couple buckets of tears over the years--you and Bro Dave--but thankfully,that's water over the dam now. (Horrible pun.)

It makes Mama X smile to know I'd have a following if I could create a blog,but even though I'm a grand ole dame, I don't have the time nor can I consistently come up with whimsical observations like some people I know. (At this point I believe she was talking about me.)

There was attached a list of senior citizen fashion no-no's, but do you really need visions, and the ensuing nightmares, associated with entries like "Don't wear a thong with your Depends"? No, I didn't think so.

I think in her own way she really does love me, though I think it would pain her greatly for anyone to find that out. In fact, last year for Christmas she got me a carrot. And she had taken a knife and carved "You're OK" into it and tied it with a ribbon. It was touching in a "Hey, I just got a carrot for Christmas" kind of way.

Travelin' Ed