Sunday, January 30, 2005

The Tim saga: Dude on a plane.

A catholic, a hooker and a Jew walk into a lesbian bar. ...Oops! Wrong blog.

Met a guy on the plane from Denver to San Diego today. Boots, buckle, hunting cap-the real deal. A man from Missouri named Tim. He sat down in my row and we "howdy'd" each other and got ready to fly. You know, buckle in, scope out if there's any babelicious stewies (Nope...well, maybe they were 25 years ago, but now...a definate nope) and figure on napping.

Don't know how it happened, but we got to talking. One thing quickly led to another and we found a common ground. Seems when he was in his twenties he had lived in Thailand and traveled extensively in country. He even spoke Thai, although it was beginning to atrophy. Wow.

I am sure he had many interesting stories, and if every time he tried to tell me one I hadn't launched immediately into a very long, yet pointless recollection of my own, he probably would have shared them with me.

Tim, if you read this, sorry dude. I think I was just so excited meeting a fellow traveler. If you're going to be in Florida you know how to reach me . A cold drink, a fat cigar and I will yeild the floor to you.

Travelin' Ed

Saturday, January 29, 2005

Not homeless

The lady 2 doors down from Mom called me and asked me to come look at her house this morning. I've known her since 1976, used to go fishing with her son. We signed the contract for me to buy it this afternnoon. Huge corner lot. 3 bedroom 3 full bath. New roof and new pump in the well. $190,000. Her daughter is in real estate, so only fees we will pay are the ones to the state and the bank. No realtor related fees and NO BOGUS FEES either. I am stoked. Same deal from me, $50,000 down, finance the rest.

Mom and Dad live at 612 Marphil Loop in Brandon, FL. I will be living at 608 Marphil Loop. So I guess you can go home again. Well, maybe. We'll see.

My work is done here. Plane tomorow back to San Diego. Back to Tokyo the morning after that. Aloha.

Exhausted, out.
Travelin' Ed

Friday, January 28, 2005

Bought a house...chickened out....still homeless

Been looking for houses. Finally found a great one 3450 sq feet. Big lot, yard, tri-level. All new appliances, new dual heat pumps. Private bass lake. I loved it. $249,000. I would put $56,000 down, $1450 monthly mortage. I offered $240,000 and I'd take it now. He wanted full price. I said meet me halfway, I'll give $245,000. He said OK, but only 10 days to get a loan, vice 30 and cut the time for inspection in half. I said, here's a counter-counter offer...I don't want to buy it anymore.

I'm a first time home buyer and a real babe in the woods about this. But one thing I do know. If you want me to buy it right now and don't want me to have time to compare financing offers, and ESPECIALLY if you want to rush me into not being able to get it professionally inspected, then there must be something you don't want me to see or know. I ain't gonna stick around to find out what it is. And I really don't intend to buy it to find out what it is.

I got a good education, though and will be more prepared next time I do this in about 6 months.

Been running around like a chicken with my head cut off. This will continue to be an intermittent blog for the next couple of days and then I'll be back in Japan.

Homeless, out
Travelin' Ed

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

24 kpbs. Boo-yah!

I enjoyed my first 3 days here. Connected to the world at 100 Mbps on the high speed modem. All day yesterday it was out. The front desk lept into complete inaction when I complained, but I figured, "How long can it be before someone who maintains the actual server notices it is down?". The answer, friends, is "Who the heck knows!" I do know, however, that it stayed down for the rest of my stay. So I complained mightily on the comment card, pointing fingers and naming names, and mailed it to Headquarters in Virginia Beach.

I am conncted via Bamnet (a GREAT company and an excellent convienence) which I keep on as an emergency backup. Usually I get a decent speed, but today I am at a crawl. 24 kpbs. So today's blog is short and is intended mainly to let you know I am alive and well and will post again tomorrow from the greater Tampa area.

For those of you so inclined, please say a little prayer for sk. She could use the support. I'm not providing any details as I feel like these things are a private matter. You get the prayer up there and God will know what it's for.

Beets, out.
Travelin' Ed

Monday, January 24, 2005

Stuff you oughta know

It was nice to watch football on a Sunday afternoon like God intended instead of 3 AM on a Monday morning. And, while AFN (armed forces network) does a fine job, there's something to be said for a night gorging on FOX,UPN &WB. From what the wife tells me, there is still no TV in Ikego. I need to find a way to tell her I'm not coming home til there is. HaHa. I'm just kidding. I don't really plan to tell her.

Here are the things I learned last night from the tube:

* Dad went out for cigarettes and never came back. He said "Smell ya later" (sob sob) b-but he never smelled me again. (wail)--Nelson on The Simpsons

* It's a bummer going to school. We have to make a pigeon out of felt. -- Lisa Simpson

* Awwww...screw you all. -- Doug Heffernan, King of Queens

* I'm not scared, I just worry about my parents going through my drawers after I die. -- Drew Carey

PBS, out.
Travelin' Ed

Sunday, January 23, 2005

10 things: My 45th Birthday

Things to ponder on your (my) birthday:

10. Just supposing you live to be 90, and considering the bourbon & cigars that's a stretch, you are halfway done and now on the downhill slide, brother.
9. All things considered, if you exclude a couple of broken teeth, there's not a lot about life to regret or to change if you could.
8. Your 3 best friends from high school and your first best friend from the navy are still your 4 best friends with a bond as strong now as it was back then. Remarkable, considering teen year friendships are usually rather intense but short lived.
7. Music still makes your butt wiggle and begs you to sing along loud and tunelessly, but somehow isn't quite as IMPORTANT as it was in years past.
6. Comfortable (i.e., pants, cars, hotel rooms,shoes) is a lot more important than it used to be. Especially the pants.
5. The idea that I can regain my large(ish) biceps and flat stomach has been completely abandoned.
4.Geting bifocals was an easy decision once you realized that a) you couldn't go the rest of your life without reading and b) try as you might, you couldn't will your arms to grow longer.
3. Family and stability takes on a new importance in your life that used to belong to adventure and excitement. Living in one place for a while doesn't seem so much like a waste of a good life as it used to.
2. You know what show comes on what channel at what time. Even Friday and Saturday night.
1. Well, you're middle aged bubba, but you still got a damn fine head of hair.

Bleats, out
Travelin' Ed (San Diego Bureau)

Saturday, January 22, 2005

San Diego

Atfer a particularly lay over laden journey I am in SD. I don't have any work until Tuesday, so I can mess around tomorrow and Monday. Probably tomorrow I'll stay in and watch football, though.

A few months ago my office realigned and now we come under a new big boss. So where 6 months ago I would be in a nice hotel with a rental car, I am now in Navy Lodge sharing a car with 2 officers....meaning I have my feet or a taxi. Oh well. At least I have high speed internet in the room. Today I'm just too tired to be real entertaining. Maybe tomorrow.

There's a really good cajun resturant down in the Gaslamp District. Might hit it tomorrow night. I can take the trolly there, so it's not a big hassle to get around. I think there are some cigar bars and a nice martini bar there in the Gaslamp too. I suppose on a Monday night live music would be too much to hope for, but still it could be fun.

Oh yeah. Tomorrow's my birthday. I'll be 45. I knew if I didn't kill myself by the time I turned 19 I'd be OK. I was right.

Travelin' Ed

Friday, January 21, 2005

Travelin' Ed: The man, the myth, the movement

OK, time has come to move a little. Been home 14 days. That meets the 2 week criteria.

I fly out today for San Diego, for some freakin' conference or another. I have achieved United Airlines 1K status, so I check in at the 1st class counter, use a different security line at the larger airports and get to use the lounges now. Plus, I get a little larger seats. See, I fly for the government, so I have to fy coach, but the 1K perks are decent enough. That is why, 1 month after achieving 1K status, the gov't renegotiated all the contracts and American Airlines won to be preferred carrier on all of my normal routes this year. I'm stuck in plain old economy. Damn!

4 Days in San Dog, and I am flying off to Brandon, FL for 3 days running around with a realtor looking for a suitable abode to buy. 3 whole days, so you know the search will be exhaustive.

Fly back to SD on the 30th and fly out...destination Tokyo...on the morning of the 31st. A litle dateline magic and a day vanishes right out from under me and I touch down at Narita International the evening of the 1st.

That's why my moniker is travelin' Ed. Don't think for much longer though. I think after moving back to Florididdy I will earn the new name of....Never gets off the block Ed. Word. Again I say, word, dog. (Yep, I'm all about the "street".)

If this blog becomes a litle intermittent it is because a) I'm spending a fair amount of time on planes and in airports and b) I'll be on dial-up for the next 11 days and this blog updates way slow on my cable modem and T1 lines. I can only imagine the trouble I'm gonna have at 48-56 kpbs. We'll see.

I'll see you on the flip flop.
Bees, pout.
Travelin' Ed

Why yes, it's another poem. Why?

I got the title to start and end with the same word. Cool, huh? It's like a palindrome sentence except it doesn't meet the actual criteria to be a palindrome. Therefore it is, but it really isnt. Screw 'em, I still fairly well continue to amaze myself...and I digress. The poem, gentle readers*.


I found the words I thought I'd left with you
Undisturbed and lain beneath old dust.
But I just left them there and turned away
I'm not someone I think you should trust.

I held my finger up and in the wind
Let the sunlight warm me to my bones
I was always almost always there
When I wasn't always almost gone.

My old best friend he called on the phone
together we shared silence on the line.
I'll see him when I've got some time to kill
That's the way we do most all the time.

Woman, I once gave my soul to you
Foolishly the way I'm so inclined
Though we both knew I could not hold your heart
Still I held on blindly to the lie.

If there's calm before the storm I'm gonna soon be blown away
The rain and wind will turn these chains to rust
I blow through life on whispers and on howling hurricanes
I'm not someone I think you should trust.

I found the promise I had sent away to die with you
My mind a became a flood of memories.
But I just left it lay, you know I realized today
The ways it tried to bring me to my knees

I have no calm at all, a storm inside me blows away
The rain and pain I lean on like a crutch
I blow through life on whispers that insist on haunting me
I'm really not someone that you should trust

The whispers are like ghosts but ghosts no longer frighten me
Like when I close my eyes and and I see us
Wish I could ride away on wings of what we almost had
But I guess that's just asking way too much.

Room 738
Hotel Port Shine
Maizuru, Japan

* Gentle readers - HaHa I stole that from Miss Manners. She's got it going on.

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Inconcievable as it may sound

I went to a transition assistance course to demilitarize myself in preparation for retiring and joining forces with The Home Depot. It was a good idea and we learned a lot. There was a lot of stuff we didn't know that we didn't even know we didn't know. Word.

One thing we did was a mock job interview. I was all spiffy in my suit and confident in my qualifications. We commenced.

When the interview was over I was asked by the facilitator how I thought I had done. I felt compelled to respond truthfully and said: "Well, I had a lot more words than I had things to say.".

That's right. I kept verbalizing and all, but never really said anything useful. Worst was that as I was saying nothing, quite verbosely saying nothing I might add, I knew I was just spinning my wheels. I could just never get it on track.

Lord help me when I have to interview for real. I'll be doing just fine. Then I'll open my mouth. I shudder.

This blog is like that mock interview. Lot of words that wander around and circle back but never get anywhere. At that I am a master.

Ferity, out.
Travelin' Ed

Can I get a witness??

Well, now what do you know. I just got my first unsolicited testamonial. Oh baby!

If you know me, and you should because a lot of people do and they're really quite better off for it, you know that I am completely without ego. Well, enough ego so that my head doesn't become a vaccuum and implode but not a single bit more. Nada, zilch,zip. In fact I go to great lengths to ensure everyone knows I am humble, understated and without an annoying ego. It is a topic I broach early and often. But enough.

Here is the testamonial, totally unsolicited, from someone who is perhaps my only biggest fan, in it's entirity, unabridged and unmolested, glorious in it's simplicity:

"Do take care. I am still loving reading your blogs. Keep it up- they keep me smiling! And for further entertainment you can always click up in the top right corner of your blog and go on to other peoples blogs and see how much better yours is to theirs! sk"

Man oh man, that's the kind of thing what keeps you going when you're in the blog business. Once I thought some buttwipe group of loosely connected organizations was dissing on me and I was hopping mad. Up and down on one foot, yammering like Yosemite Sam, just short of the steam out of the ears deal. But boy is my face red now. Seems they were dead set against loggers....not bloggers. Mea culpa, homeys.

Lobbygow for now.

Meromorphic, out.
Travelin' Ed

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Maybe I'm just sensitive, but....

I was reading the news this morning. I was catching up on the latest relief efforts for the tsunami victims. When I got to this statement I kinda got pissed off. Maybe I'm sensitive, but this quote kind of takes America's charitable largesse for granted, like us giving tens of millions of dollars and airlifting food and medical supplies we not noteworthy because we do it for everybody. I don't care how many times you respond to a catastrophic natural disaster, you should be apprieciated each and every time.

I don't think that as a country we need or expect parades and exaltations, but I do think we deserve better than this dismissive attitude. I don't think he really meant anything by his remark. That also troubles me some.

Sorry, I'm certianly not a right wing, might makes right, love it or leave it kind of guy, but it struck a nerve. Here is the paragraph that got me going (bolding, italics and font coloring mine):

"The French are starting to move food, of course the Americans....are moving food out, but this has to increase ten-fold, I would say," Augstburger told Reuters, adding that tsunami victims also needed items such as clothes and cooking utensils.

[Dismount soapbox] [Slow pan] [Fade out]

Speak, out.
Travelin' Ed

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Still Listing

More lists from an offset mind. They're not as easy as you'd think, but we suffer for our art, no?

10 word combos I haven't Googled yet

10. Liquid brain stem
9. Gilded flatuance
8. Hypnotic crustacean
7. Tiger sniffing
6. Hobo depression
5. Spectator work site
4. Distinguishedly nondescript hero
3. Corduroy thimble
2. Innovative fence post
1. Pan fried dingo

9 Ways to kill time

9. Bake tarts (heh heh heh...he said tarts)
8. Sports on television
7. Find a new road on the map then go drive on it
6. Eat at a different resturant all 4 weekend meals (breakfast= 7-11 coffee)
5. Find a quiet pond and fish
4. Build a koi pond in your yard
3. Talk with old people
2. Start a blog then post to it
1. Go for a long, leisurely walk and take your camera along

8 Things that suprised me

8. How big basketball players are in person
7. How little weight you're allowed on airlines now
6. The breadth of carnage the tsunami caused
5. How good I karaoke
4. How big my ass got
3. How fast my ass got big
2. How cute my wife looks in braces
1. How much I seem to enjoy Tarantino flicks

7 More things that suck

7. Losing your TV for the whole 3 day weekend
6. Realizing homes cost $150,000 more than you expected
5. Spilling coffee on yourself on your way to go meet someone
4. You favorite team losing all of it's televised games and winning thrillers in the ones that are not televised
3. The secondary search at airport security
2. Infants with the stamina and inclination to cry for over 3 hours straight on an airplane
1. Having to pretend that you care about something

5 More things I wonder about

5. What it's like to be weightless
4. If I'll get cancer because I smoked as an adolescent
3. How big is the rush surfing on a giant wave
2. Do insects percieve time
1. If I get to be 80+, will I start to think about death a lot

4 Colors

4. Aqua
3. Gray
2. Yellow
1. Maroon

3 Feminine traits I possess

3. I get all weepy at real sad stories
2. I have a lot of shoes
1. I get moody

2 Coolest movie scenes ever

2. The 5,6,7,8's scene (and even more so their music video's included extra on the DVD) in Kill Bill Vol. 1
1. The John Travolta/Uma Thurman twist scene at Jackrabbit Slim's in Pulp Fiction. Uma says to John, "Dance good.".

1 Coolest automobile
1. Jaguar, hands down

Our Brothers in (Baby) Blue and my astounding brain wattage

Just after I married her, I taught my Thai wife 2 things in the guise of Americana. I taught her to turn her head and spit on the ground in disgust at the mere utterance of the word "yankee" and I taught her to assume that anyone wearing Air Force Blue was gay. Homosexual. A pillow biter.

Now, I will admit that in the following post I stopped far short of mentioning that this bomb was never actually tested. In fact, I only posted the parts what made me chuckle, chortle and snort. But the truth is stranger than sweet, warm friction and I did not make any of this up.

I did not do exhaustive research on the validity of this story so I don't have the positive certainty that this is not satire. I did, however, skim over most of the high points before deciding to post it. So at the very least it's as trustworthy as anything you might find on the CBS Evening News (with Dan Blather). Follow the link gayairforcesex to read the original news release in it's entirety. Here, presented in AF Blue, is a truely strange tale:

The Pentagon briefly looked into making a weapon that would render enemy troops sexually attracted to one another, according to an official document uncovered by a watchdog group that monitors research into biological and chemical weapons.

The proposed aphrodisiac was part of a weapons development plan circulated in 1994 at the U.S. Air Force Wright Laboratory in Dayton, Ohio. An outline of the plan was discovered by the Sunshine Project and posted on its Web site.

The six-year plan included development of several "non-lethal" chemical weapons, including one that would inflict "severe and lasting halitosis" in enemy combatants and a "sting me/attack me" chemical that would cause bees to become more aggressive.

The aphrodisiac chemical would be designed to make enemy soldiers sexually irresistible to each other. The resulting widespread homosexual behavior, the proposal suggests, would cause a "distasteful but completely non-lethal blow" to morale.

NEW Topic of (Dis)Interest:

Just for grins I took another IQ test. I'm not insecure, I'm inquisitive. Or at least that's the story I'm sticking to.

Anyway, it was just as I had suspected. I am getting noticeably smarter. I have gone from a 126 IQ to a 135. "Holy crap!", as Frank Barone would say, "I'm a freakin' genius".

I posted this statement earlier, but rather than post it disappeared. So now I only have the e-mail confirming I'm "gifted", but not the more gaudy and ultimately more pleasingly postable screenshot I used previously. C'est la'can't always get what you want....Que sera, sera....bye bye Miss American Pie...ooops, Im wandering again.

Your score is 135.
William, you are an Insightful Linguist.This means you have the natural fluency of a writer and the visual talents of an artist. You also have a creative and expressive mind. (It is all so very, VERY true)

Piece (of my very large mind), out.
Travelin" Ed

Billy Bob Thorton in Pushing Tin

You may remember a little while back I waxed poetic on how well I liked John Prine. I even posted the lyrics to his song Onomonopia. Blah.Blah. Blah de blah blah.

Well last night since the cable was out we were watching some DVDs. First we watched...well, I've already forgotten what we watched first. But then we watched PUSHING TIN. It's about Long Island, NY air traffic controllers and stars Billy Bob, Angelina Jolie and John Cusack. I was watching the scene where Billy Bob was trout fishing in a stream in Colorado when I thought noticed something. So I backed it up and paused it and yes, there it was bigger than Dallas. He had on a John Prine ballcap.

I mean, how cool is that?

Oh yeah, the first movie we watched was Men In Black. I rememberize now.

Spaz, out.
Travelin' Ed

Monday, January 17, 2005

Long weekend...Reall-ll-ll-y long.

Friday night, thankfully after SECOND CHANCE FEAR FACTOR, the satellite that beams the TV to 15,000 of us in Japan & Korea quit transmitting. OH NO!!!!! I was OK on Saturday because that's Friday night in the states and not yet a big sports day. But the TV was still out on Sun. and Mon. (Sat & Sun stateside) and I missed 3 basketball games and all 4 NFL playoff games. I was mega-bummed and sulked. I was actually reduced to (estrogen alert!) cleaning out all of my closets and ironing all of my dress clothes. The lamest 3 day weekend of my life.

Had my cable modem fritzing on and off all weekend, too. Just assumed the problem was tied to the cable TV problem. Now I know it wasn't and I should have called and complained. I could still complain but the moment has passed. Now I'd really just be a whiner. That's why I didn't post all weekend. Well, that and the whole closet thing.

OK, I know I'm not 13 anymore, but X-RAY vision still holds an appeal for me. Just because I think I'd be hanging out at the beach more than I do now doesn't mean I wouldn't use my power predominately for good. Probably.

I was shopping in the commissary Thursday. I was talking to a friend of my friend's wife (I know....whatever) when something caught my eye. "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?", I asked.
Her reply? "Yes I am, I married the wrong man." Ha Ha, not a true story.

Monkey Boy Gallery
Monkey boy #1 Monkey boy #2 Monkey boy #3
Monkey boy #4 Monkey boy #5 Monkey boy #6
Monkey boy #7 Monkey boy #8 Monkey boy #9

Peels, out.
Travelin' Ed

Thursday, January 13, 2005


Lazy Post #3.

I'd never thought about it before,but this is good advice from the good folks in Durham Township, PA: Click me

Yea, though I be "Monkey Boy" to those who know this guy has me beat: The Master Monkey Boy

Love this guy's cartoons. They are NOT gentle. It's called Red Meat.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Tell Me, Child

Tell Me, Child

Last night I knew you were a wandering child.
A pretty young, painted thing.
And hard, like a diamond ring.
Chasing the same things like I did one time.
Me, I never got too close, but Lord. I remember those

Emotions disregarded.
Do you know how broke a heart gets?
Tell me, child. Do you know?

Years, like a soft veil, just fall away.
Silent until you find
you can't call them back to mind.
So I'll blow the dust off my old memories
I stole from the lost and found.
Lord, I remember now

Little things I never thought we'd
want again or ever might need.
Tell me, child. Do you know.

Wandering child...
Do you think you are the first to dance with shadows?
Too many of us have and such a long, long time ago.
And what were only lonely fires
we mistook for our desires.
Were they, child? Do you know?

So you wear your badge of youth for all to see.
Yes, yours are the only eyes
that can clearly see tonight.
I'm more like a ghost from some forgotten time.
But answer this question dear:
What road has brought me here?

Here... where the lights start blurring
are there any lessons learning?
Tell me, child. Do you know?

Wandering child...
Do you think you are the first that's danced with shadows?
Too many of us have and such a long, long time ago.
But what were only lonely fires
we thought must be our desires.
Were they, child? Do you know?

Sweet wandering child, do you know?


You Still Shine

You Still Shine

Been off and long gone
Chasing after rainbows and songs
Way too long.
What have I found?
A bunch of different ways to bum around.

Caught you in a glimpse
Again and again
So many miles away but you still shine.
Like a star that was lost
from that old southern cross.
And if I have one regret it's that you'll never be mine.

As the days come and go
A heart always shows
The scars it wears as proudly as tattoos.
This one's from the navy
This one's from my baby
This one's from the Philippines for who knows who.

The sun's hanging low
And I gotta go
I never was too good at hanging 'round.
Like your old favorite song
I was already gone
By the time you figured out to set me free.

I said the sun's hanging low
Now I gotta go
I never couldn't ever hang around.
Like your old favorite song
I'm already gone
An old restless rambler, that's me.


Monday, January 10, 2005

Things found on Google Image searches

I like to type in random word pairs and see what comes up in google image search. Here's an idea of the type of stuff you find.

A few times here I linked to the website that a pic was found on rather than the pic itself either because the pic by itself wasn't self-explanatory or because I found it interesting that the particular word combo caused that particular page to surface.

It's a deceptively addicting time waster.

Word typed: INSANITY
1. Glen Buxton's website with this certificate

Word typed: mobile trousers
1. Party Domain's cheap knock-off
2. Not sure why this website hit

Word Typed: fuzzy shoes
1. Not fuzzy. Not shoes. But with a nice, nautical theme.
2. Scroll down far enough to see the "BARF stop".

Word typed: Butt pickles
1. I was stumped at first. Check out the co-author.

Word typed: pimp candy
1. Strangely, I had typed "ass shaving" earlier and got nothing. Pimp candy gets this photo.
2. Convienently, this is bite sized pimp candy.
3. Then you gotta wash it down.

Things what makes me amused

From my TV viewing tonight. These things made me smile.

...I'm going to stick to paranoid and nuts, Charlie.
-Alan on Two & a half Men

There's one thing I will not tolerate in this house and that's rhyming insults.
- John Cleese on Will & Grace

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Rimshot, please

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A jumper cable came up to me yesterday and I warned him, don't start anything.

Travelin' Ed

The Ultimate Sailor Song. All True...mostly.

Read the lyrics to TRIANGLE first. It's a love song. Really.

Then, if you wish, listen to TRIANGLE the mp3.

Travelin' Ed

OK...I'm sold!! Emode's Classic IQ test.

I don't feel too smart these days. Combatting a bit of self-doubt, I am, I am. Anyway, this was cool and made me smile, though I'm sure it is some trick of technology or psychology...or pschycotechology, if you will.... that allowed them to so thoroughly tell me what I wanted to hear. My hat's off to 'em.
T' E

Congratulations, William! Your IQ score is 127

This number is the result of a formula based on how many questions you answered correctly on Emode's Classic IQ test. Your IQ score is scientifically accurate; to read more about the science behind our IQ test, click here.

During the test, you answered four different types of questions — mathematical, visual-spatial, linguistic and logical. We analyzed how you did on each set of those questions, which reveals the way your brain processes information.We also compared your answers with others who have taken the test.

According to the sorts of questions you got correct, we can tell your Intellectual Type is a Word Warrior(Yep! Good call).This means you have exceptional verbal skills (Again, correctamundo.). You can easily make sense of complex issues and take an unusually creative approach to solving problems (And to creating problems, we must remember.). Your strengths also make you a visionary (With glasses, but yes, a true visionary). Even without trying you're able to come up with lots of new and creative ideas. (Man, it's like they KNOW me!!)

And that's just a small part of what we know about you from your test results. Find out more about your unique intellectual strengths in your personalized 15-page IQ report. It's ready right now!

Dudes, I'm sold. Where do I sign up?

Freaks, out.
Travelin' freakin' genius Ed

Gimme the hour back!!!!

Just watched LAST COMIC STANDING. If it's not too much trouble, I'd like the hour back. Here's what I learned on the show.

Won.1) It was a year ago today.

Too.2) They say money talks. All it ever says to me is "See ya, bitch!".

Har de har har.

Faust, out.
Troublin' Ed

New Pictures from Thailand

This pic is for the marines out there. Read the town's name out loud. Tambon Welcome sign.

Papa & Massom took us up to Chang Mai to stay in their apartment. That was cool of them.

Here's a view from inside a tuk-tuk. And here's fun transport if you are not in a hurry and have your life insurance paid up. Not sure what they call it, I call it a bike tuk-tuk.

Pictures from the great temple (Wat something or other) on the top of the mountian in Chang Mai. The elephant buddha, sunburst buddha, buddha line-up, reclining buddha,and the jade buddha. Check out this multi-headed dragon. This dude is at another small wat we went to the next day. By the way, ever wonder how buddah actually gets to the wat? I thought maybe there was some cosmic travel involved. Well, cosmic in a Toyota sort of way.

Every meal is a barbecue cause almost everything is cooked outdoors. This was lunch just outside the entrance to the hot springs we visited. Inside, we soaked some, made new friends, ate again (check out the menu, especially #11 & #13), and enjoyed the gardens.

Here is a pic of Bangkok, and another view.

There was downtime in the hotel room, but sometimes it was ESPECIALLY ENJOYABLE! Yowzer, it was fun making that pic. twice before I proclaimed it "not right", so I could do the pose again. Then I convinced Lee to do it too, although there was not a lot of arm twisiting involved HaHa.

My most daring pose. Could you read the sign? Here's a close-up to help. Actually, I was 3 doors down from here when our troops rolled in and the war started.

Remember I kept posting about the outdoor cafe we ate at everynight with friends? Here's our favorite waitress. Here's a bunch of our friends on the night we spent $77 dollars and I got all buzzed and karaoked. Here's just the girls. I am proudest of this. It is possibly the only picture of Nong where she looks like the pretty girl she is. Usually she makes a pig face for the camera. Who knows? You can also tell by the way me and Bobby have lost our sharp edges that the fuzziness has begun for the evening.

OK, that catches you up on the photos for now. Tomorrow I have some other things planned. Look for the Thailand Dec04-Jan05 album on my web page and you'll find a few more photos, although I got most of the high points.

Yeast, out.
Travelin' Ed

Saturday, January 08, 2005

Tom Downs New site info

As promised, here's the link to Tom's new site.

Be sure to check out his songs and lyrics. He also has included pictures and other media work and a page of quotations that definately point to ...well, let's just say that they point to something and leave it there

Now he's included a link with 4 of his son's band's songs. Not too shabby stuff.

Travelin' Ed

Friday, January 07, 2005

Headed out

Oh....really tied one on last night. We had 7 other friends out with us at the same little outdoor cafe. Spent $78 and I couldn't tell you how much food and draft beer there was. Eating, drinking, and karaoke....what have I become??

It was truly international. Bobby & Lee are Brits, I''m marginally American, David Fang is Chinese and his wife and the rest of the girls are all Thai. We had a ball.

I am headed back out to the pool for one last bake-fest before I return to Nippon tomorrow. While I have enjoyed the sun, am ready to go home.

Back home will get some of the photos from this trip posted, maybe some lyrics and other stuff to spice it up a little. Anyway, if working from home I'll have time to ponder the snakey side of life and the ability to post whenever I think of something, rather than holding it (and forgetting a lot of it) til my daily trudge down to the internet cafe. Peace, y'all. Swasdee kob.

Travelin' Ed

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Winding down

Went and checked out a new hotel for next time. It's the place with the outdoor cafe where we eat a lot with our friends. I told Nong, if we were spending every night here anyway, let's save the tuk-tuk fare home and just stay here next time. Not as nice as where we are now, but the price is only $13 a night.....and that's before we send Machima to start working on our hook up! Good deal.

Almost burned my pudgy little body at the pool yesterday. I'm all pink and was headed for red.

Nothing going on. Kinda just hanging out and waiting to go home. Tomorrow will hit the Embassy to MPS* another 6 boxes home. We're mailing all of our clothes too, because we fly NorthWorst home too, and they made us empty our suitcases coming over. We'll, we could have paid $700 to move 30 pounds**, but didn't have that amount in my pocket change.

* MPS= Military Postal Service. Basically it's free mail in theater and Thailand and Japan are both in theater.
** We were actually under our allowed weight, however we didn't have it spread amongst enough suitcases. We were allowed 80 kg (4 suitcases X 20 kg). We had 63 kg in 2 suitcases, which apparently is an offense worth $700 to the airlines. I hate them, I hate them.

Peace, out
Unravelin' Ed

Ya, go home

All is well. We are still in BKK but winding it down. Grandmom is home and looking and feeling good. Everybody was giving her the kid glove treatment but on the 4th or 5th day I said "Ya, go home". Ya means grandmom. She just smiled at me and you could tell we were in agreeance on that. She went home that day, too, but it was more because the doc came in and said she could.

Me and Nong went out to an outdoor cafe last night with 4 other friends. We had 11 dishes brought to the table, 4 pitchers of Singha Draft, 4 large bottled beer, coffee, dessert, the whole 9 yards. Cost: 2,062 Baht, or right at $50. Throw in a very generous tip (thanks to the 4 pitchers of draft beer and some cutie waitresses) and it was about $56. Man, I love this place.

Beets, out.
Travelin' Ed

Monday, January 03, 2005

The 10 lists

10 songs I love

10. American Pie by Don McLean
9. Old Man by Neil Young
8. Crescent City by Lucinda Williams
7. The Party Never Ends by Robert Earle Keen
6. Now I Lay Me Down to Cheat by David Allan Coe
5. If That Ain't Country By David Allan Coe
4. Sam Stone by John Prine
3. City of New Orleans by Arlo Guthrie
2. Tangled Up in Blue by Bob Dylan
1. He Stopped Loving Her Today by The Possum, George Jones

5 Secret code phrases

5. There is one key for everything and another key for everything else.
4. The smile will fade when the goose steps lightly.
3. If when you say when you mean what time, what then will we tell the child?
2. Slow and languid, the lizard basks. So too, Mister Riley waits.
1. What fun hath this drivel wrought? Why do you continue to read?

2 Best Album Titles

2. A Lamb Lies Down on Broadway by Genesis
1. As Falls Witchita, So Falls Witchita Falls by Pat Metheny Group

Favorite Brand of Beer

Free beer.

Tidbits, not bit tits

Mr Tom Downs has a new web site and all of that. Will post a link to it next week when I return home. Great place to get lyric sheets or listen to, and download, mp3s of his songs.

Went to a mall last night to see a movie. Perhaps it is actually a chain of malls, as I'm not all that mall saavy. It was called the Emporium. Nothing but Louis Vitton, Rolex, Mont Blanc, Cartier, etc, etc. Like I said, I went to see a 140 Baht movie, National Treasure, fairly decent. What struck me as interesting, though was that more of the folks there had cameras in their hands than bags. Seems most just came to snap pictures of themselves in front of these places. Hmmmm.

Grandmom is out of her hospital bed and sitting in a chair now. She has that look in her eyes that she is more than ready to go home and get away from having 4 people fall all over themselves to help every time she wants to go pee. Man, she surely has my sympathy.

Onomonoseeya. Peels, out.
Travelin' Ed

Sunday, January 02, 2005

Louisiana Memory

I was remembering something today as we travelled by cab to somewhere to eat. I was watching the cityscape go by and memorizing as much as I could. I can get around Bangkok pretty good by now, but it's a big city and I always try to learn more.

Anyway, unlike Japan where every single place in every city looks pretty much the same, BKK has districts and distinct markets and such, so you can learn your way around. I was thinking about that which got me thinking about this.

I was in rural Webster Parish Louisiana and had been invited to fish a farm pond. All I had to do was go down there (as opposed, I suppose, to the pond coming to me). Having never been there before I asked a Louisianian (the place is just crawling with them) how to get there.

"Ya know where old man Fizer stays? You turn off just past his place." was the first directions I got, but they were not real useful to me. "Uh, no.", I replied.

"Wellllll, then take this road right here up to the blinkin' light and go left. Follow that on down and turn right on the 3rd paved road past the last bottom bridge and you'll see it right soon after that. Good fishin'.".

I swear, I did not make that up. It reall happened and I actually ended up fishing on the Dorcheat Creek that day. Later I had the guy that owned the pond show me how to get there.

PS: Grandmom is doing fine now and will be home maybe tomorrow.

Peices parts, out.
Travelin' Ed

Saturday, January 01, 2005

Grandmom's down

Spent last night, well most of it anyway, at the Rama 9 Hospital. Grandmom was not right. No specific illness or injury. Just not quite right. Nong is all up in arms 'cause she loves grandmom so much. But at 90 years old, this is not really unexpected. She looks like she'll be fine and will be home tomorrow.

I didn't get any help with my song, so I'm figuring y'all were all busy partying like it's 1999 and didn't have time. I'll let it slide, since I'm just that kind of guy.

Am slowly learning Thai. Today I tried ordering my own meal. I was close, but haven't mastered the nuances yet. I ordered (phonetical spelling here) ka-pow koo-kai. It means basil chicken on rice. Except what I apparently asked him was to grab a rooster out of the yard and put him in my rice. No one explained before that while koo-kai is indeed the word for chicken, cooked chicken you are going to eat is just called gai. So I should have said ka-pow gai.

The waiter was smiling at me with amusement, but did actually understand me. Anyway, I figure I should have no trouble remembering ka-pow. Just conjur up old Batman shows...KA-POW!!! GAI!!! Holy poultry, Batman. Check out that chicken.

Last note. Moo means pork. so Ka-pow moo is basil pork on rice. Boner appetite!

Peeks, out.
Travelin' Ed